LET’S TALK, OKLAHOMA: One Conversation at a Time

Hope Starts with Conversation. Change Starts with Action. There are conversations communities enjoy having and there are conversations communities need to have. Domestic Violence (DV) belongs in the second category. It can be uncomfortable to discuss. It often happens behind closed doors. Victims may be afraid or unable to speak openly about what is happening to them. Friends and family members may recognize that something is wrong but not know what to say or how to help.

The General Federation of Women’s Clubs (GFWC) of Oklahoma believes silence cannot be the answer. That belief became the foundation for Let’s Talk Oklahoma, a statewide domestic violence awareness and prevention initiative designed to bring conversations about abuse out of the shadows and into communities across the state.  Oklahoma has 19 clubs in 16 cities.  To date, seven clubs have signed up for September and October dates with the first panel discussion completed on September 10 hosted by the GFWC-OK Inter Se Club of Hugo and the second on September 24 hosted by the GFWC-OK Sorosis Club of Waurika.

The concept  for Let’s Talk, Oklahoma is straightforward: bring people together, provide reliable information, introduce communities to the people and organizations already doing this work, and start talking. But behind that simple idea is a much larger goal—to help create safer and more hopeful Oklahoma communities.

Why does Oklahoma need to talk about DV? Intimate partner violence remains a major health problem in Oklahoma. The Oklahoma State Department of Health reports that approximately 40 percent of Oklahoma women and 38 percent of Oklahoma men experience intimate partner physical violence, rape and/or stalking during their lifetimes. The Oklahoma Attorney General’s Office cites and even higher  number with 51% of women and 42% of men having reported at least one DV incident in their lifetime.

The impact reaches Oklahoma’s young people as well. State health officials report that among Oklahoma public high school students, approximately one in 14 has experienced recent physical dating violence and one in 15 has experienced recent sexual dating violence. There is encouraging news. Oklahoma’s Domestic Violence Fatality Review Board reported 87 domestic violence homicide victims in 2024, a 29 percent decrease from the previous year and the state’s lowest total since 2017.

That Progress matters. But so does the reality behind every number. Every statistic represents a person.  A family. A child. A friend. A coworker. A neighbor. That understanding helped shape the approach GFWC Oklahoma wanted to take. Instead of simply telling people that domestic violence is a problem, Let’s Talk Oklahoma asks communities to become part of the solution.

Let’s Talk Oklahoma is designed as a 16-city awareness and prevention tour, with GFWC clubs serving as the umbrella organization in communities across the state. In addition to the two clubs who have completed the community discussions, other participating clubs and communities include Antlers GFWC-OK Antlers Twentieth Century Club; GFWC-OK Duncan Owl and GFWC-OK Duncan Philomathic Club;  GFWC-OK Anadarko Philomathic Club, GFWC-OK McAlester Fortnightly, and GFWC-OK Durant Fortnightly Club with additional communities joining the statewide effort.

GFWC Oklahoma is providing media support for the Oklahoma Clubs including press releases, Facebook posts that are unique to each city,  Instagram posts, inviting print and broadcast media to the individual locations, providing signage for each event and offering a $150 stipend to help offset that costs at the local level.  All panel discussions will be recorded so they can be shared among clubs and also to provide a mixed-media video which will be played at the GFWC Oklahoma Legislative Day at the Oklahoma State Capitol on April 19, 2027 where a luncheon will be provided by GFWC Oklahoma for senators and representatives from our own districts.

GFWC Oklahoma is also providing three different buttons for attendees at the panel discussion to take home as a reminder of the information shared at the event. 

Each local event is built around a community panel discussion. The panel may include law enforcement officers, prosecutors and members of the judicial system, domestic violence advocates, tribal representatives, social-service organizations, shelter professionals, healthcare providers and other leaders whose work intersects with domestic and sexual violence.

That local approach is intentional. Domestic violence may be a statewide problem, but resources, challenges and solutions can look very different from one Oklahoma community to another. A rural victim may face transportation challenges or live many miles from emergency shelter. Someone living in a small community may worry about confidentiality because everyone seems to know everyone. Native American victims may navigate tribal, state and federal systems. Families may not know what services exist until they suddenly need them.

The GFWC Signature Program: Domestic and Sexual Violence Awareness and Prevention focus on eight areas: intimate partner violence, child abuse, teen dating violence, campus sexual assault, elder abuse, violence against Native American women, military sexual assault and human trafficking for sexual purposes. Through the Signature Program, GFWC encourages clubs to educate the public, advocate for victims and survivors, collaborate with community organizations and support established programs.

Let’s Talk Oklahoma takes those principles and puts them into action at the grassroots level. GFWC members are not presenting themselves as the experts on domestic violence. Instead, they are doing something civic organizations have done successfully for generations: They are bringing the experts and the community together.

They are opening doors, arranging chairs, inviting speakers, publicizing meetings, asking questions and creating a place where an important conversation can happen. Sometimes service means providing something. Sometimes it means raising money. And sometimes service means bringing people to the same table.

October is recognized nationally as Domestic Violence Awareness Month, but domestic violence does not follow a calendar. Neither can prevention. The ultimate goal of Let’s Talk Oklahoma is not simply to conduct a successful series of events. Success will be measured by what happens after people leave. Perhaps someone will recognize a warning sign they previously overlooked. Perhaps a teacher will better understand what a student is experiencing at home. Perhaps a friend will know what to say when someone confides in her. Perhaps a victim will discover that help is available. Perhaps two organizations will meet through a panel discussion and begin working together. Perhaps a community will decide that this conversation should continue long after the chairs are folded and the meeting room is empty. Those possibilities are why GFWC Oklahoma is asking members and communities across the state to embrace three simple actions: Stand up. Speak up. Show up.

Attendees will be asked to sign the Pledge that was distributed at the International Conference in Scottsdale.  The Pledge that we will Stand up, Speak up, & Show Up against Domestic Violence.  The panel discussions will be reviewed by how many people attended, how many pledges are signed, and how many people want to find out more about joining GFWC.  We will check to see if website logins at gfwc-ok.org increase and if more people are clicking on the Signature Program tab on the site.

Across Oklahoma, those conversations are beginning. From one club to another. From one community to another. From one person to another. hope starts with conversation. Change starts with action. Let’s Talk, Oklahoma!